If you're a moron, like me

One of the banes of my existence is managing the timezone thing - I live in mountain time and work largely with clients and employers who are based on the East Coast. Normally it's not that big a problem, except when I travel there. Flight times are always local time, so you get hosed when you take the flight info stuff from a travel booking site and put it in your calendar - yes it lands at 11:00 pm, but that's mountain, so like 1 am Eastern. I'm forever making the wrong calculations.

Because I am a moron.

But I just added the Mountain timezone to my Outlook display following these helpful instructions from Lifehack, and I'm feeling better already!

A Vacation Day is Best Taken Not In the Office

Okay, I know it's intuitively obvious to the casual observer, but your best vacation day will be one taken outside your office. But when you telecommute full time and you take the occasional vacayday it can be so tempting to just pop into your home office and do a little work. Stella is not going to lie to you: she did pop in the office this morning for a little work, but now I've taken myself out for a quick bagel.

And I'm blogging to you live from the coffee shop. I've totally become that guy tippity-tapping my keyboard at the coffee shop.

Don't hate me for my battery life.

Reducing Isolation: An Update

If you're a full-time shut in like Stella, you know that you can get a little weird the more time you spend alone. That's why it's important to seek out interaction and activity outside the house. I find that getting that interaction during my workday is a little hard to manage -- I've yet to really work successfully in a coffee shop, for example. I seem to spend so much time horsing around with the wi-fi in public places and by the time I get it all set to rights my laptop battery is 2/3s gone and my hands are shaking from the coffee.

So instead, I'm trying to be more social in the other things I do in my life besides workin. For example, I'm making more of a point to make friends at the gym. Okay, friends is a strong word for it - acquaintances is where I'm at, truthfully But it's nice to see people with whom you can share some desultory chit-chat with, and on whose lives you can catch up. It keeps those small talk skills honed, and helps tamp down the monk-like desire for absolute quiet.

I also started singing with a symphony chorus this year, so this is a weekly commitment to go out and sing music, do performances every few weeks, and generally act like I'm a member of a larger community. Again, it's not exactly a pathway to deep connections, but it means that I now know people in my city who are not related to me by blood or marriage. I know a good optometrist who is also a lovely soprano. I know a couple of musical computer geeks who do assorted nerdy things.

And of course, I still do tons of stuff with the extended family -- I'm no more than two phone calls away from having a house full of people drinking gin and tonics and eating gluten-free hors d'ouvres right now.

But what these casual social commitments are doing for me is just taking me a little more out in the Real World - and that can't be a bad thing.

If You Can Work From Anywhere

Why not work from the ski slopes like this developer for Etsy did last winter. While my corporate culture doesn't really accommodate this kind of thing, it's theoretically and technically possible. And I think it's kind of a great idea. You could really make this kind of arrangement work if you (like Stella) are in a different timezone than your core office, too.

Let's say you're a Hawaii surfing enthusiast (the real kind of surfing, not web surfing, goofballs) and you work for an East Coast outfit. You get up really early, work the East Coast 9 am to noon, surf the morning in Hawaii time for a couple of hours, then work East Coast 2:30 - 6. And you still have time to do other stuff before you go to bed. See? That could work.

Stella is considering a moderation of this: working Friday afternoons at a coffee shop. It could work. Maybe I'll try it today?

So Stella Just Woke Up

And realized that Thanksgiving is next week. Really, how did it get to be almost December so quickly? However it has come to be, the holiday season is upon us and I can't help but feel a little bit like the Grinch in my disbelief that it's happened again. Last year, Stella was going to try to organize a telecommuters' holiday party in her home town. That didn't get very far, largely because I just sat around and didn't really do anything. This year, I posted a Craigslist ad recruiting local telecommuters. Um, that'll work, right?

So, taking it one step further: I'm declaring December 18th official holiday party day (to coincide with my Real Office's actual holiday party). So you know what we're going to do? Twitter a party. I'm starting it now #vivaciousdisembodiedhead.

Twitpic your best crazypants holiday sweater (or crazypants crazy pants!). Get drunk in your pajamas at eleven in the morning, and then tweet. Come on now! Well, not now. Unless you want to now.

You know, I'm not about command and control. I'm about having a good time all the time.

Beyond Casual Friday

Casual Friday isn't that big a deal here at Stellacommute Central. As it is I'm normally on the casual side of "software start up in someone's garage" so it's really hard to get more casual when I want to relax. Luckily, I've been turned on to the methods of office devolution through this easy-to-follow visual guide. So not safe for work, kids, but so funny.

I'm off to kill my own lunch with a bow and arrow. Carry on.

In the Office, But More Uprooted

Stella is getting ready to go on-site in the Real Office next week, and as usual it's a mixed bag. Of course, seeing people in person, having meetings that reassure instead of having technical problems that make people wonder if I'm making static noises with my mouth so I can get out of conference calls, and wearing shoes are always fun.

But the downside to being on-site is camping out in a conference room and running madly from meeting to meeting.

It just feels inefficient and frazzling. But hey, that's the work people. I'm trying something new this time, though. Instead of thinking of it as "camping out", I'm going to consider myself "location independent." And while my windowless conference room isn't exactly a cafe on a Greek isle, but if I close my eyes...

No. That doesn't work, but thinking of my self as independent rather than rootless may help.

We now resume normal social activity

If by "normal" you mean "going to a bar and taking a test with your in-laws". We played Geeks Who Drink last night for the second week in a row, making it officially a thing. Our stalwart team leader Margret was home doing something meaningful with her baby (hence our team name) but we had another team member back from a long-term work assignment in Tulsa, so we had to go. Second place. Alas.

Feeling Lonely?

This is an interesting idea: a virtual portal. It's like having a little window into your office with a friend at the other side. This piece from LifeHacker suggests that you do it with sound, but you can also use a video-only+IM solution to have that sense of "someone else" with you without disturbing each other with the quiet swearing under your breath and keyboard clacking that might happen if you have a live mic and camera going all the time.

This would also be good practice for people like me who have to go back to the Real Office on a regular basis. Because when you're all by yourself all day it's easy to forget that removing shoes, applying lotion to your feet, and then putting your shoes back on to enjoy the fabulously moisturized feel between your toes is not something you can do in your Real Office. With people around. Who can see you.

Just saying.

Internet Alternatives

I was speaking with my rep from a third-party vendor that I work closely with, and she is a telecommuter too. She was telling me a horror story: her home office internet went on the fritz and the ISP said that it would be perhaps a day before it was back up and running. Horrors! She hopped in the car to go to a nearby coffee shop and discovered their interwebs were out too. And so it went. Hours (and a few repair guys later) she was back in, but in the meantime, no work, no meetings, no VoIP, none of the things you rely on.

Honestly, I don't know what I would do if I had a lengthy internet outage. Cry maybe?

I'm Starting My Own Jelly

Well, kind of. My very good friend and fellow pub-quizzer (and her delightful pub-quizzing husband) just bought a house around the corner from mine. Like, it's a three minute walk over there (unless you're accompanied by dilly-dallying preschoolers, in which case all bets are off).

She's a nerd and usually she works in a Real Office. But she's having a baby really soon. And she's not really taking any maternity leave to speak of. And she'll be working at home very soon. So we're plotting our own informal semi-regular co-working arrangement.

I know what you're thinking: Stella, aren't you always preaching that working at home isn't a substitute for daycare? It is absolutely true. You cannot really work with a kid around. I am also a person who came home from the hospital after having my second kid and immediately logged into to take one last bit of malingering code live before officially starting my maternity leave. The baby was asleep in her little carrier seat next to me, and I worked. A bit, and not because my manager asked it of me, but because I wanted to get a few things wrapped up so I could relax.

Newborns eat, sleep, and poop. In between, you're kind of left with vague worrying about whether they seem stuffy or not, checking to see if they're poopy, and messing around on Facebook. Why not be productive? If that's what you want to do.

So yes, we'll give the co-working thing a try on an ad hoc basis. I'm envisioning walking over there for lunch and then working for the afternoon. Or vice versa. Or her coming over after my older child gets home from school -- the big kid can look after the baby, and we can go partake of wi-fi and geekery.

But first she has to have the baby.

On-Site Insight Number Two

Okay, Stella technically wasn't on-site this week. She was not in her home office, but rather than traveling to the Real Office she instead went to the city where her Real Office used to be for a conference. That is a terrible sentence. I should just say, "Baltimore".

Yes, the conference was quite worthwhile. Yes, Stella managed to get a fair amount of the regular work done at night and that one day when the luncheon was so packed full that she couldn't get a seat and so she hid in her hotel room for an hour and a half and worked while eating a bag of salt-and-vinegar potato chips she pilfered from the exhibitors luncheon buffet. But here is my on-site insight for this trip:

Being out of the office causes a greater hit on productivity than just the time spent away -- you have to add in the time you spend catching up, too. You know it's true: when you're not in your office, even though you answer your phone and zip off emails every time your Palmberry goes off, the reality is that there are something things that you just can't deal with when you're not in your natural habitat. It's more a mental thing, I think, than a lack of access to the technical or information resources you need.

Maybe it's just me, but I find when I crack open my Blackberry and see some horrible problem arise and it's ten at night and I'm in a hotel room, I just can't deal with it. It exasperates me. I don't want to fire up my VPN and get the documents that prove that the other person is deranged and send them around to all the people the crazy person carbon-copied on the original message.*

I. Just. Don't. Want. To.

So I fire off an email response that says, "I'll fix your wagon when I get back home." And I do that again and again. And then when I get back home I have to pick through all that stuff I only half answered and re-answer it. Not efficient. Ah well, such is life. I should be all caught up by Friday.

* For the record: this didn't actually happen on this trip. All my colleagues were perfectly well-behaved and in full possession of their mental faculties, no worries.

Second Place Is Okay

We had our full team last night at pub quiz, plus a special out of town guest and so we did well, score-wise. Just not quite well enough. And frankly the team we lost to (by a mere two points) is comprised of worthy opponents all. I don't mind losing to them, honestly.

We scored a surprising perfect round on the Mixed Martial Arts. Strange. And the whole team contributed to that ace, not just the 23 year old man we keep on the team for just such purposes. Interesting.

Winners, But with a Pathetic Score

You're all well aware of the sad state of Stella's social life. We're talking about a life limited to moderating a tiny number of comments on her blog, special times in her home office with the dogs and cats, and Geeks Who Drink. It's gratifying to win, but it does make me sad that we scored so poorly. Oh, well.

At least our team name was good this week: Ironically, Michael Phelps Finished the Freestyle in 420. We were clearly missing our main stalwart, Margret, but the addition of a new bit of estrogen was a welcome treat.

Am I Becoming Weird?

I work in an entirely different time zone than all of my colleagues. I interact with them quite a bit on the phone, web conferencing, IM and email, of course, but generally speaking this interaction is on my terms. I initiate a call, I look at who's calling and decide if I'm going to answer, or I opt to look at my email.

It's peaceful.

So yesterday when I was at the gym, I almost fell off the eliptical machine when the person next to me burst through my bubble of "I won't see anyone I know here". It was the girlfriend of one of my niece's friends, a perfectly nice young woman. We chatted for a while, and then my time of punishment was over. But I felt vaguely disturbed. Should I change gyms so I don't have to see her?

Yeah, okay. I am becoming weird. I must embrace random acts of socialization, I guess.

Geeky Winners: Us

Thank goodness we finally won again, because it was getting expensive to buy drinks without the winning subsidy.

I know, dear readers: it's depressing for you to think of Stella and how her only social outlet (other than rampant instant messaging, yakking on the phone with colleagues, and talking to the elderly check out guy, Mac, at the grocery store) is going to a bar to drink beer and take a test. But that's how it is.

At least we're good at it.

Sloppy Seconds

Sigh. Again. Second place by one point, and we had many second-guessed points that we gave up throughout the course of the evening. But with our regular compliment of team members and a whole round on Cyberpunk movies that we did quite well on, it was an overall fine showing. And once again, I'm forced to emphasize that the point of Geeks Who Drink is going out with my family and friends and enjoying each others company.

And winning, dammit. We're going to redouble our efforts next week, I'm sure.

Holiday Party Season Commences

And for far-flung telecommuters like Stella, this means one thing: sitting in my home office continuing to work whilst my colleagues toddle down the hall to enjoy assorted pot lucks, cookie trays, shrimp cocktail, and occasionally free drinks. Actually, avoiding all that stuff doesn't sound that bad, now that I write it. I only need to resist the treats that normally reside in my house, without contending with a parade of fattening temptations that appear in the break room at this time of year.

That said, it is also a well-documented fact that holiday party attendance can be an important career move in both a positive and negative way. The positives: networking, a chance to meet people you might not normally encounter, free food and drink. The negatives: lampshade on the head.

But what kind of holiday party equivalent exists for the telecommuter?

I suppose someone could drag a laptop and camera to the party venue and I could watch from home. But that's kind of lame. I will often start a personal party at the same time -- I'll go to a movie or get a pedicure or something fun.

This year, I'm thinking about trying to organize a telecommuter office party here in my town. I first need to figure out how to hook up with other telecommuters (without getting involved with a lot of work-at-home multilevel marketers -- nobody wants to deal with those people because they're always trying to rope you into selling their fine products). From there, it should be easy.

Bar, hors d'oeuvres, terrible holiday sweaters, fun!

So if you're a telecommuter in Albuquerque, let me know.

Alcoholics Victorious*

Okay, we're probably not technically alcoholics (one of us is pregnant, for pity's sake) (oh, and it ain't me, babe) but we did come out winners on Wednesday at Geeks Who Drink.

The pluses: going out with beloved friends and family, enjoying a tasty beverage, pretending I have a social life, pwning the competition.

The minuses: it's in a cavernous sports bar that caused the more noise sensitive of our group to hold his head in agony, the waitstaff is all female and all clad in tiny referee shirts and very short shorts. Which in and of itself isn't terrible I suppose, but it just felt like I'd stumbled into the wrong place.

Will we go back? Yes, we must because we won a gift certificate with which to acquire complimentary sliders and beers when we go back.

* This is the name of an actual alcoholics' support group that meets in Baltimore. We never were really sure if it was intended to help people not drink, or to celebrate the awesomeness of an alcoholic lifestyle -- you can't keep us down, Bill W!

I'm Imagining Sweaty Feet

But it turns out that the jellies that are spreading around the world are instances of Jelly, the totally fun co-working sites that people participate in. Casual co-working sites are a good way to break up your routine a little, meet like-minded people who work in the same ways that you do, and maybe network a little.

Personally, I've been considering trekking over to my local coffee shop one afternoon a week just to have some fun and jolt my brain a little bit. It seems like it would be easy enough to do -- my Skype rings wherever my computer is (or I can just forward it to my Blackberry), the wi-fi is everywhere, and I'd be drinking coffee anyway, so why not give it a try? I'm just a little paranoid because of my long held position that as an employee, I should be grinding away in my office just like everyone else.

I'm a little conflicted about it. What do you think I should do?